New father

**LeedsLeedsLeeds** · 6th August 2008 10:15

Sanitysub is of the fairer sex m8.

**kenkannif** · 6th August 2008 10:16

Originally Posted by 8ball

KK

u've been lucky not 2 hav had the preggers thang tried on u

Me lucky? Or people that have had it done to them unlucky?

Originally Posted by reinvented

this boards a poore a place without he of many names ken, glad he posts on the otter channel

I will worship at the Chruch of Snaf....forever!!!!

Quality!!!

**8ball** · 6th August 2008 10:30

Originally Posted by LeedsLeedsLeeds

Sanitysub is of the fairer sex m8.

*ouch

thx Frodo

still a silly post but innit

Originally Posted by kenkannif

Me lucky? Or people that have had it done to them unlucky?

That's a fillysofickal point innit K

maybe ax ur priest

even if u get no good advice,,,,u might get bummed

**Nick** · 6th August 2008 10:56

Originally Posted by 8ball

maybe ax ur priest
even if u get no good advice,,,,u might get bummed

Every cloud, eh?

**kenkannif** · 6th August 2008 11:00

Originally Posted by 8ball

That's a fillysofickal point innit K

maybe ax ur priest

even if u get no good advice,,,,u might get bummed

I tries my best chap

**8ball** · 6th August 2008 11:01

I find sumfink positive in most situations Nick

as u prolly already know

*cough

**Nick** · 6th August 2008 11:02

**Xtrafresh** · 6th August 2008 17:19

Originally Posted by daniel36

The prospect of living in the United States and having a child living in Thailand that I will see maybe twice a year doesn't make me happy. The young lady I spoke about is a caregiver of sorts for her younger siblings since both her parents are dead and she doesn't want to move to the states. I don't believe I can live in Thailand and think the economic/political state of affairs might not make it a very nice place to be in the near future. I have a wide range of emotions about this. I can't make her move and I don't think I can move. Others have suggested I forget about her and the child which I don't want to do. Guess the best I can be is a part time father.

I have only respect for you daniel. There are not to many "men" in this world who take care of their responsibility if they were thrust in a similar situation as you have been. Utmost respect

Xtra

**Killing Me Softly 101** · 6th August 2008 17:41

Originally Posted by daniel36

from what I've read it seems like there would be more negatives with me moving there. I could never own land, limited job prospects, problems with visas, political instability, and always being an outsider are a few of them.

She can own land. The child (when grown) can own land. You can get a 30 year lease. You can buy a condo.

Everyone here has to deal with visas.

Really pretty weak excuses in my opinion. However I am skeptical about the entire thing. She has insurance if she works at Katsakorn. So the medical fees are covered. If you decide not to get involved in the kid's life (if this is not a scam) to a large degree but not be a deadbeat dad, there are good infant care centers in Bangkok and they are not expensive. You could fund that, and the international kindergarten in a few years, etc. Of course get the paternity test.

Originally Posted by reinvented

its silly to plan on maybe backing out 10 months down the line if you're already here

Yeah. You either want to spend your life with this woman or not.

If you want to spend your life with this woman, why wouldn't you buy the house in her name (after the P Test). It is a better option that structuring it in your name if she is a scammer anyway. Then she can just kick you out instead of hiring Khun Somchai, the guy behind all those Thai smiles.

**stfranalum** · 6th August 2008 17:58

Originally Posted by daniel36

Living in Thailand? I work in real estate buying and selling right now.

looks like you wont have that job if you put your kid first

Originally Posted by daniel36

I am in a difficult situation because I have very little say here. She will decide what to do.

you are such a fag.

you either give a shit about your kid and make an action plan or you say fuck it, and forget it all.

Originally Posted by daniel36

her old world femininity

if shes old school, then you get old school and act like a man, and do what it takes to take care of your kid.

who cares about your past telecom industry blabber. you either forget it, be a long distance daddy, or get your ass here and figure it the fuck out.

that, or stop asking such stupid fucking questions.

man, i was in your spot in a way. i got a girl pregnant, sans marriage. what to do?

-abort the kid
-keep the kid and split
-keep the kid and work it out

not too fucking hard a choice, although the road is hard (my kid was just born) but the road mending a relationship was tough, as getting preggo without a long term plan can be stressful- and we were stressed. big time.

but ultimately you have only a couple choices. if you look inside yourself, you will know what to do.

stop philandering and decide. if you want to be a dad, move to thailand.

if you want to get her stateside, then do what it takes. if she wont and youre really powerless, then move here, or stop bitching. (or i guess you could just send money to her

, which usually ends you up in a stickman column)

good luck.

i suggest talking to your friends. they know you best. this is a rough rough call. on the other hand, if you know that you wont accept anything less than being a dad, its a simple thing from that point on.

if you want neither, then its easiest for you to just turn your back.

**Sanitysub** · 6th August 2008 18:44

Originally Posted by 8ball

*ouch

thx Frodo

still a silly post but innit

That's a fillysofickal point innit K

maybe ax ur priest

even if u get no good advice,,,,u might get bummed

I meant that he would "know" with regards to timing. I too suggest a paternity test (as women can indeed tell fibs) - but it's not like the OP is stating that he "has no idea" where she's coming from. He "knows" that he has participated in acts that weren't the most careful...

I think the OP should first suggest to the lady in question that she has this pregnancy confirmed by somebody with medical knowledge before he moves onto paternity worries...it may be that she is just stressed or not eating well and isn't pregnant at all...

S.

ETA: I have had another thought (unlikely - but in the event of this lady not reading the information contained with her pills thoroughly): Is she taking a break between sheets or is she taking another sheet as soon as the last is finished? If the latter then her periods will stop. They will stop and not return until she takes a break...Unlikely, but "just in case".

**i1der** · 6th August 2008 22:30

stfranalum is right on, well said man.

**i1der** · 6th August 2008 22:46

yes

**stfranalum** · 7th August 2008 06:56

i was in a bind recently just like this dude.

but i want to be a father so bad, im willing to make some sacrifices. it isnt perfect, and i do need to reapt that to myself. but saying you cant move to thailand because of your job or political strife...give me a break. its simply about priorities.

but i get the sense this is just a wind up.

consider me had.

**daniel36** · 7th August 2008 07:17

Op here. Again I appreciate the positive comments and for the negative guys....."you can take a flying leap up a billy goat's ass," as my grandmother would say so eloquently.

There are many possibilities here and I'm trying to sort through them thinking that there might be some people here that have been through similar situations and might have found things I have not yet considered.

This girl is pregnant as confirmed by her doctor already, she is university educated, works in a bank, and isn't a bargirl.

I'm trying to think of options if she doesn't not want to move here. Maybe an American company that would hire me. I'd work at McDonalds if I had to and thought I could make a modest income to be closer. I wonder what the prospects are of landing a job with an American company in Thailand. Anyone have experience with this?