Thread: I am being taught to be disgusted at myself

So, two ads on t.v.: the first is a husband whose wife keeps telling him "no" as he tries to do stupid or dangerous things, then he gets some Oscar Meyer meats and his daughter says, "did mom say we can eat that?" and he says "yes." The narrator says, "it's nice to say yes for a change."
Second ad: a "disgusting" middle-aged man is plucking nose hairs with tweezers while wearing a teenage girl's bathrobe. She walks into the room, says "Hi Uncle Steve" with a disgusted look on her face. It's an ad for Clorox bleach.

I'm just amazed at how I am constantly being told to be disgusted at my body, my sexuality, my emotions, basically everything about being a man. I understand the appeal of Asia in general and Thailand specifically, where male sexual desires are at least not denigrated with such contempt as in America.

I am very grateful that I have a Korean wife who doesn't berate me for finding young women attractive, for having sexual desire, for having body hair, and for all of those things that make me a man.

I'm also very concerned for the younger generation in America, who seem increasingly effeminate, cowardly, and weak.

/rant

Originally Posted by Thinkingofachange

I understand the appeal of Asia in general and Thailand specifically, where male sexual desires are at least not denigrated with such contempt as in America.

Young women in Japan have a whole vocabulary with which to denigrate males, particularly middle-aged males, who apparently have a yen or ten-thousand for the very girls themselves. In Asia generally there is a feeling that sexual desire in older men is perverse, unnatural and even improper. You don't have to walk far in either Tokyo or Bangkok to find young women who find their male contemporaries "effeminate and weak".

This American exceptionalism is more than a little overdone.

When I'm with the wife, walking down the street, I'm constantly giving her a running commentary on where and how I would make the young Chinese women feel satisfied. An example would be "That one from behind" or "Just in her mouth". She laughs.

Thank you my wife. I love you for putting up with me being me.

Originally Posted by manned-rake

In Asia generally there is a feeling that sexual desire in older men is perverse, unnatural and even improper.

Perhaps I misunderstand this sentence. But from my experience sexual desire in older men isn't really seen as a big deal in Asia. But that's just my experience.

Originally Posted by manned-rake

Young women in Japan have a whole vocabulary with which to denigrate males, particularly middle-aged males, who apparently have a yen or ten-thousand for the very girls themselves. In Asia generally there is a feeling that sexual desire in older men is perverse, unnatural and even improper. You don't have to walk far in either Tokyo or Bangkok to find young women who find their male contemporaries "effeminate and weak".

This American exceptionalism is more than a little overdone.

Thanks for the reality check. You remind me that I've read many stories of men being arrested for basically doing nothing in Japan (Police Hunt Man for Standing at Station | Sankaku Complex). Perhaps I should temper my grass-is-greener attitude.

---Update---

Originally Posted by NET

An example would be "That one from behind" or "Just in her mouth". She laughs.

Thank you my wife. I love you for putting up with me being me.

My wife is similar--she will constantly point out good looking women in Korean and ask me my opinion.

Originally Posted by NET

But from my experience sexual desire in older men isn't really seen as a big deal in Asia. But that's just my experience.

I'm generalizing from years of conversation with young Japanese, Korean and Taiwanese women.

My experience tells me I am hansum man with good heart.

Originally Posted by manned-rake

I'm generalizing from years of conversation with young Japanese, Korean and Taiwanese women.

Marriage rates are notoriously low in China, Korea, and Japan, which does support your argument. If I had the option to stay single instead of marrying a spitting abusive alcoholic Korean man with an insecurity complex and an obsession with his mother, I know what I'd choose.

I think maybe it's a way that this contempt manifests itself. You don't get emasculating ads and sitcoms in Asia like you do in the west--the contempt that young girls have for middle aged men is hidden by a patina of respect that is missing in America. Maybe that's what bugs me--but maybe having it out in the open is better.

I don't fucking know.

Since the 50s TV ads have wanted to make you think you have bad breath, too square to own a cool car, you shouldn't smoke a cigarette that isn't prestigious cause it doesn't have a recessed micronite filter.

Originally Posted by manned-rake

In Asia generally there is a feeling that sexual desire in older men is perverse

And from watching ton of Japanese porn, my experience tells me this statement is incorrect!

Originally Posted by jonny danger

Since the 50s TV ads have wanted to make you think you have bad breath, too square to own a cool car, you shouldn't smoke a cigarette that isn't prestigious cause it doesn't have a recessed micronite filter.

Yeah, but why am I being told my body is repulsive in order to buy bleach? Why am I being told it's normal to be bossed around by a bitchy wife in order to buy bacon?

so 2 ads

now watch the rest which denigrate women.

Originally Posted by samsara

now watch the rest which denigrate women.

Yeah--I haven't seen any. There was also a yoghurt ad where two very ugly housewives were complaining about their ugly husbands until they turned into John Stamos when they ate the yoghurt.

I have no problem with that, if there were also ads of the reverse, but I don't really see them.

Originally Posted by Thinkingofachange

Yeah--I haven't seen any. There was also a yoghurt ad where two very ugly housewives were complaining about their ugly husbands until they turned into John Stamos when they ate the yoghurt.

I have no problem with that, if there were also ads of the reverse, but I don't really see them.

what? i was in the states just 3 months ago and half the ads are denigrating to women

what are you watching? QVC?

Originally Posted by samsara

i was in the states just 3 months ago and half the ads are denigrating to women

Can you give me an example? Because the typical makeup ad with pretty women selling lipstick is hardly what we're talking about here.

Originally Posted by Thaitanium

Plus the whole point behind advertising is to create problems in order to sell the solutions...

Oh look at you...you're fat...fat is bad(problem)...here buy this and it will make you thin(solution)...

There is an important and fine distinction that you aren't making.

Advertising by definition creates problems and then promises a fix for sale. Sometimes, it creates the problem by telling the audience how inferior they are, and then offering a product that makes them less inferior.

That's not what is happening in these two ads. They are referencing the societal assumption that men are henpecked/disgusting/whatever. The bleach ad wasn't saying "you're a disgusting middle aged man so buy this bleach"--it was saying "middle aged men are gross, aren't they? So if one happens to use your stuff, buy this bleach."